In Loving Memory of Vic

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Need to get to a meeting and speak to someone right away? Below is a list of online meetings and resources to help you find a meeting and fellowship.

+ Alcoholics Anonymous Online Meeting Finder
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+ Al-Anon Online Meeting Finder

Daily Recovery Readings – April 20

Just For Today
April 20

“Addiction is a family disease, but we could only change ourselves.”
IP No. 13, “Youth and Recovery”

Many of us come from severely damaged families. At times, the insanity that reigns among our relatives feels overwhelming. Sometimes we feel like packing our bags and moving far, far away.

We pray that our family members will join us in recovery but, to our great sadness, this does not always happen. Sometimes, despite our best efforts to carry the message, we find that we cannot help those we hold most dear. Our group experience has taught us that, frequently, we are too close to our relatives to help them. We learn that it is better to leave them in our Higher Power’s care.

We have found that when we stop trying to settle the problems of family members, we give them the room they need to work things out in their own lives. By reminding them that we are not able to solve their problems for them, we give ourselves the freedom to live our own lives. We have faith that God will help our relatives. Often, the best thing we can give our loved ones is the example of our own ongoing recovery. For the sake of our family’s sanity and our own, we must let our relatives find their own ways to recover

Just for today: I will seek to work my own program and leave my family in the care of a Higher Power.


Daily Reflections
April 20

. . . we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.

When said sincerely, this prayer teaches me to be truly unselfish and humble, for even in doing good deeds I often used to seek approval and glory for myself. By examining my motives in all that I do, I can be of service to God and others, helping them do what they want to do. When I put God in charge of my thinking, much needless worry is eliminated and I believe He guides me throughout the day.  When I eliminate thoughts of self-pity, dishonesty and self-centeredness as soon as they enter my mind, I find peace with God, my neighbor and myself.


Twenty-Four Hours A Day
April 20
A.A. Thought For The Day

The satisfaction you get out of living a sober life is, made up of a lot of little things, but they add up to a satisfactory and happy life. You take out of life what you put into it. So I’d say to people coming into A.A.: “Don’t worry about what life will be like without liquor. just hang in there and a lot of good things will happen to you.  And you’ll have that feeling of quiet satisfaction and peace and serenity and gratitude for the grace of God.” Is my life becoming really worth living?

Meditation For The Day

There are two paths, one up and one down. We have been given free will to choose either path. We are captains of our souls to this extent only. We can choose the good or the bad. Once we have chosen the wrong path, we go down and down, eventually to death. But if we choose the right path, we go up and UP, until we come to the resurrection day. On the wrong path, we have no power for good because we do not choose to ask for it.  But on the right path, we are on the side of good and we have all the power of God’s spirit behind us.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be in the stream of goodness. I pray that  I may be on the right side, on the side of all good in the universe.


As Bill Sees It
April 20
Surveying the Past, p. 111

We should make an accurate and really exhaustive survey of our past life as it affected other people. In many instances we shall find that, though the harm done others has not been great, we have nevertheless done ourselves considerable emotional injury.

Then, too, damaging emotional conflicts persist below the level of consciousness, very deep, sometimes quite forgotten. Therefore, we should try hard to recall and review those past events which originally induced these conflicts and which continue to give our emotions violent twists, thus discoloring our personalities and altering our lives for the worse.

<< << << >> >> >>

“We reacted more strongly to frustrations than normal people. By reliving these episodes and discussing them in strict confidence with somebody else, we can reduce their size and therefore potency in the unconsciousness.”

1. 12 & 12, pp. 79-80
2. Letter, 1957


Walk in Dry Places
April 20
Avoiding emotional whirlpools

If we were rattling down a rough river, we would try to steer away from whirlpools and rocky rapids. Living each day requires the same alertness.

We’re asking for trouble if we drift into malicious discussions about other people… even those who seem to deserve it. We’re also sliding into rocky rapids if we get into supercharged arguments about political and religious issues.

How do we avoid touchy situations that can lead to violent arguments or terrible breakdowns in personal relationships? We can begin by recognizing that we’re not on this earth to judge, manipulate, or control other people. We’ll do well today to keep our own performance up to a good standard.

We can also respond correctly to people who seem hopelessly wrong. Borrowing an idea from one Twelve Step program, we can detach from such people with love, even if circumstances require continuing contact with them. At whatever cost, we must avoid emotional whirlpools and rocky rapids in life.

Looking ahead at the things might happen today. I’ll adjust my thinking for situations that could be troublesome or destructive. I will try especially hard to avoid trouble with my fellow workers.


Keep It Simple
April 20

A great obstacle to happiness is to expect too much happiness.

Our disease is sometimes call the disease of “always wanting more.”

We push ourselves to get as much pleasure as we could. If one was good , two was better.

We didn’t see that what we were lacking was faith.

At times in recovery, we still crave “more.”

We must pay attention to these cravings. When we have a craving, maybe we’re scared, and our Higher Power is trying to tell us that, if we have faith, we’ll be taken care of. Perhaps our Higher Power just has a message of love for us. All we need to do is listen. It may be that this is only “more” we really need.

Prayer for the Day: I pray to see my as spiritual needs. I pray to turn to my Higher Power instead of to alcohol or other drugs.

Action for the Day: Today, I’ll think about how much recovery has given me. I will share this with a friend and with my Higher Power.


Each Day a New Beginning
April 20

One has to grow up with good talk in order to form the habit of it.
–Helen Hayes

Our habits, whatever they may be, were greatly influenced, if not wholly formed, during childhood. We learned our behavior through imitation, imitation of our parents, our siblings, our peer group. But we need not be stuck in habits that are unhealthy. The choice to create new patterns of behavior is ours to make–every moment, every hour, every day. However, parting with the old pattern in order to make way for the new takes prayer, commitment, determination.

All of us who share these Steps have broken away from old patterns. We have chosen to leave liquor and pills alone. We may have chosen to leave unhealthy relationships. And we are daily choosing to move beyond our shortcomings. But not every day is a successful one. Our shortcomings have become ingrained. Years of pouting, or lying, or feeling fearful, or overeating, or procrastinating beckon to us; the habit invites itself.

We can find strength from the program and one another to let go of the behavior that stands in the way of today’s happiness. And we can find in one another a better, healthier behavior to imitate.

The program is helping me to know there is a better way, every day, to move ahead. I am growing up again amidst the good habits of others, and myself.


Alcoholics Anonymous



– It took an “angel” to introduce this Native American woman to A.A. and recovery.

This mountain town was a place I had visited as a child with Dad and Grandma. Memories of the stories of my childhood and our Indian people flooded in. I got a job cleaning cabins for a local resort lodge and got back on welfare. Shortly after our move, my son started school. By this time I was consuming nearly a fifth of tequila each day, and blackouts were occurring on a regular basis.

p. 462


Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
April 20

Step Four – “Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.”

We thought “conditions” drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn’t to our entire satisfaction, our drinking went out of hand and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were.

p. 47


Xtra Thoughts
April 20

You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.
–Les Brown

You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.
–George Burns

Make your life’s goal to learn and become a better person.

How can we possibly describe feeling the Presence of God? It is the difference between being a child left alone in an empty house at night and a child who knows that her mother is in the next room. Even though she can’t see or hear her mother, she feels comforted by her warm, loving, protective presence. And while a human parent can’t always be with us, our spiritual parent will never abandon us.
–Mary Manin Morrissey

“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”
–Paul Boese

The heart has eyes that the brain knows nothing of.
–American Proverb


Father Leo’s Daily Meditation
April 20

“There is nothing permanent except change.”

Today I know that I need to change. I accept that my behavior and attitude was negative and destructive. Today I make a choice to work on my addiction. I was changing before I embraced a spiritual program but the change was for the worse. Each day I grew more dependent, more isolated, more angry and depressed. I felt I was a hopeless case!

Today I am working on my anger and loneliness. I talk about those things that cause me pain and distress. I express my fears and resentments – and it is getting better.

God created this world in perpetual change and I believe that He is to be discovered in the change. I am evolving into Truth with my small steps towards recovery. The steps I take towards recovery are my “yes” to God.

In the daily changes I discover the stability of God.


Bible Scriptures
April 20

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
–1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life….”
–Psalm 23:6


Daily Inspiration
April 20

We are not given peace of mind. We must trust in God and He will be our peace of mind. Lord, You are within my heart and therefore I need look no farther to find my peace.

There is a time for everything. Take time to pray, to sing, to laugh, to work and to touch the hearts of others. Lord, help me be aware that today will never return so that I will not misuse my time or waste it unwisely.


A Day At A Time
April 20

Reflection For The Day

“If a person continues to see only giants.” wrote Anais Nim, “it means he is still looking at the world through the eyes of a child.”  During this 24-hour period.  I won’t allow myself to be burdened by thoughts of giants and monsters — of things that are  past.  I won’t concern myself about tomorrow until it becomes my today.  The better I use today, the more likely it is that tomorrow will be bright.  Have I extended the hand of caring to another person today?

Today I Pray

God may I please grow up.  May  I  no longer see monsters and giants on my walls, those projections of a child’s imagination.  May I bury  my hobgoblins and realize that those epic dream-monsters are distortions of my present fears.  May they vanish with my fearfulness, in the daylight of my new serenity.

Today I Will Remember

I will put away childish fears.


One More Day
April 20

My mind to me a kingdom is,
Such present joys therein I find
That it excels all other bliss
That earth affords or groups by kind.
–  Sir Edward Dyer

Within the private confines of our thoughts, we can build castles or dream of solving all the problems of the world.  At times, we may still daydream like children who envision themselves as heroes, builders, or saviors.  We may still unconsciously look for drama and excitement.

Maturity give us something that our youthful selves would never have understood — compromise.  We don’t have to see compromise as surrender.  For us, it can mean action.  When faced with the reality of dreams that can’t be achieved, we can compromise by building new dreams that not only are as important as our original one, but also offer success.

My dreams can still direct the course of my life.


One Day At A Time
April 20

How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now, and there will never be a time when it is not now.
–Gerald Jampolsky

During my many years of life as an compulsive eater, I thought happiness was something that was the privilege of other people. I could not imagine that happiness would be a part of my life. All I really wanted was to lose weight.

My issues with food and weight colored everything else. I always thought the biggest weight I carried was physical in nature. When I accepted the fact that I have a disease, and the weight I carried was physical, emotional and spiritual, my life began to change immeasurably. As I took the Steps to recovery, I began to experience healing on all three levels. I began to see life differently, and to live life in a whole new way.

Before recovery, I could not see the precious moment of the present. My eyes were focused on regret of the past, and fear of the future. I totally missed the complete joy of each present moment. Recovery has helped me to clear up weight I carried from my past, and to eliminate my fear of the future; replacing fear with faith. As I live in recovery, I can choose to be present in each moment, and enjoy the wonder and delight that is the gift of life.

One Day at a Time . . .
I choose to live in the present moment … and to embrace the happiness found there.

~ Cate ~


Elder’s Meditation of the Day – April 20

“You must be prepared and know the reason why you dance.”
–Thomas Yellowtail, CROW

Inside every human being is a need to dance.
We dance to music.
Have you even wondered why people are moved when they hear an Indian Drum?
The drum is the heartbeat of the Mother Earth.
Every Indian dance is for a purpose and a reason.
Every Song is for a reason.
The beat of the drum makes our bodies, minds and spirits join together in harmony.
It allows us to connect to Mother Earth and to each other.
The dance aligns our minds to think spiritual thoughts.
Dancing to the drum is healthy.

Great Spirit, today, I dance to honor you.


Journey To The Heart
April 20
Loving Yourself Will Make It Better

Are you feeling powerless? Have circumstances taken a turn you don’t like? Do you feel there’s nothing you can do to make today better? One power that’s always available to you is the power to love yourself.

Sometimes we feel powerless. We have circumstances in our lives we simply cannot change, no matter what we do to create something different, to move the situation along. We can’t get another person to behave differently. We can’t seem to change something at work. We can’t do much about our money situation, at least not at the moment. Nothing in life seems to be going our way. It’s not that we’re doing anything wrong. We aren’t off our path or neglecting a particular lesson. The energy of that particular time in our lives is frustrating. There is no action we can take to change our circumstances. All we can do is surrender to the circumstances, accept what’s happening, and stay in the moment.

During those times, there is one action we can take that will help. We can love ourselves. When we can’t do anything about the world around us, when we can’t even seem to do much about ourselves, we can always love ourselves. When all our other powers seem stripped away, we can practice the power of self-love. It’s one power no one can take away.

Self-love will always make things better. And perhaps when a difficult time is past, you’ll look back and say, That’s what I was really learning all along– the ever present, healing power of learning to love myself.


Today’s Gift
April 20

Hurried and worried until we’re buried And there’s no curtain call, Life’s a very funny proposition, after all.
—George M. Cohan

Often, when we involve ourselves in a whirlwind of activities, plans, and expectations, we push ourselves so hard that we don’t derive any satisfaction from success. We need to face our limitations. We can’t do everything we want. Even when we can do a great deal, if we overextend ourselves, take on too much, we will not enjoy ourselves, and there is no reason not to enjoy our work.

Our activities are part of what we are. If we choose to live in a frantic hurry, worrying about the next moment instead of this one, we’ll miss life entirely. Part of self-knowledge is learning to pace ourselves to our own speed, learning to set goals we can attain for each day. When we do this, we can say, “Now that I’ve completed this, I don’t have to do one more thing to feel worthwhile.”

Am I trying to do too much too fast?


The Language of Letting Go
April 20

I don’t know whether I want in or out of this relationship. I’ve been struggling with it for months now. It’s not appropriate to let it hang indefinitely. I will give myself two months to make a decision.

Sometimes, it helps to set a deadline.

This can be true when we face unsolved problems, are struggling with a tough decision, have been sitting on the fence for a while, or have been floundering in confusion about a particular issue for a time.

That does not mean a deadline is written in stone. It means that we are establishing a time frame to help ourselves not feel so helpless and to help bring a solution into focus. Setting deadlines can free our energy to set the problem or issue aside, to let go, and allow the Universe, our Higher Power, and ourselves to begin to move toward a solution.

We don’t always need to tell people we’ve got a deadline. Sometimes, it’s better to be silent, or else they may feel we are trying to control them and may rebel against our deadline. Sometimes, it is appropriate to share our deadlines with others.

Deadlines are primarily a tool to help ourselves. They need to be reasonable and appropriate to each individual situation. Used properly, deadlines can be a beneficial tool to help us get through difficult problems and situations without feeling trapped and helpless. They can help us let go of worrying and obsessing, so we can focus our energies in more constructive directions. Setting a deadline can help move us out of that uncomfortable spot of feeling victimized by a person or a problem we can’t solve.

Deadlines can help us detach and move forward.

Today, I will consider whether a deadline might be helpful in some areas in my life. I claim Divine Wisdom and Guidance in setting appropriate deadlines for any problems or relationship issues that may be lingering.


More Language Of Letting Go
April 20
Flip a coin

Flip a coin. …This is a secret technique of many prominent executives. Because sometimes it doesn’t matter what decision you make, as long as you make one. Then you just stick to it, having confidence in your having brought about the outcome.
–Jay Carter

Sometimes, we are truly ambivalent. We don’t know what we want. The scales are balanced, fifty-fifty.

. Flip a coin.

If you don’t like the decision the coin just made for you, at least you’ll know you know what you want.

God, help me discover who I am and what I really want.


Touchstones Meditations For Men
April 20

I wasn’t exactly brought up in one of those Norman Rockwell paintings you used to see on the cover of the Saturday Evening Post.
—Reggie Jackson

We have many myths about other people’s lives. When we compare ourselves to these stories, we come up short. We have the TV families of Father Knows Best or The Walton’s in our minds. We may have stories our father told about his moment of glory and how he met his challenges. Any of these images selects part of the truth and highlights it, creating a myth that might be worthwhile if we don’t take it too literally.

Living real life never feels as serene as our fantasies. A myth lifts us up, carries us away to other possibilities, but we should always take it with a grain of salt. A father’s recollections or a Norman Rockwell painting romanticizes a piece of reality by omitting the drudgery and confusion of life. Myths are meant as inspirations, not as measurements of our lives.

The difficulties and confusion I feel may just be part of real life. Serenity comes when I accept the mixture that real life is.


Daily TAO
April 20

Invocation becomes declaration;
Worship becomes recognition.
When blessings mature,
One glimpses the source.

When one is young in Tao, all practices begin as external procedures. Sometimes, it is difficult to understand their significance — we don’t know what to expect. This is proper: Not daring to interfere with growth and discovery, those who follow Tao hesitate to go beyond technical instruction.

Take worship, for example. At first, an invocation is something external. You repeat it, but really, it means very little. You kneel down at the altar because you need something on which to focus. Once you realize that the true Tao is to be found within yourself, you shift your attention. Then worship becomes recognition. Your own spirit arises, and you learn to tap into it on your own. If someone had told you what to look for, you might never be sure of your experiences. What comes from outer suggestion is not the true Tao.

Glimpsing the source leaves no doubts.


April 20

On the single road leading to this place
I saw a footprint in the moss.
The white clouds leaned on quiet banks,
The fragrant grasses closed your idle door.
I passed the rain-fed green of pines
And followed the hills to a mountain spring…
Streams and flowers spoke to me in meditation,
And I replied and cannot think of what I said.

– Liu Chang-ch’ing


Food for Thought
April 20
Food for Thought

Social Situations

Many of us find it especially difficult to follow our food plan when we go to parties and eat with friends. We may feel deprived if we do not eat and drink what everyone else is eating and drinking. Sometimes we maintain our abstinence at the party and then go home and break it for some strange kind of emotional compensation.

The longer we live the OA program, the easier it becomes to deal with social situations. We begin to realize that the company is more important than the food and drink, and we discover that we can enjoy being with our friends regardless of what we are or are not consuming. We also become convinced that only by abstaining do we maintain our health and sanity, and we value these more than whatever refreshments are being served.

Because we are stronger now than we were before, we are less affected by the social pressure to do what everyone else is doing. We know who we are and how we can best live our own lives.

May I enjoy my friends more than food.


In God’s Care
April 20

It is not up to you to change your brother, but merely to accept him as he is.
~~A Course in Miracles

We all feel qualified to correct another. We may not do this aloud, but we oftentimes do a great job of it under our breath or in our mind. We are fortunate if we learn that correcting others is not our job. It is seldom helpful to them or to us. Correction is best left to God, who knows all the circumstamces.

If we truly need to avoid a certain person, God will direct us. If not, then it’s spiritually good for us to accept that person’s defects – perceived or real – in all their glory. If we insist on seeing error or guilt, we’ll be in the wrong frame of mind to accept what a blessing he or she is to us.

Every offensive thing someone does is a call for help. If we answer it with help instead of condemnation or correction, both of us are blessed.

I would rather be blessed than be right.


Faith’s Check Book
April 20
By Faith Not Feeling

The just shall live by faith.
(Romans 1:17)

I shall not die, I can, I do, believe in the Lord my God, and this faith will keep me alive. I would be numbered among those who in their lives are just; but even if I were perfect I would not try to live by my righteousness; I would cling to the work of the Lord Jesus and still live by faith in Him and by nothing else. If I were able to give my body to be burned for my Lord Jesus, yet I would not trust in my own courage and constancy, but still would live by faith.

Were I a martyr at the stake

I’d plead my Saviour’s name;

Intreat a pardon for His sake,

And urge no other claim.

To live by faith is a far surer and happier thing than to live by feelings or by works, The branch, by living in the vine, lives a better life than it would live by itself, even if it were possible for it to live at all apart from the stem. To live by clinging to Jesus, by deriving all from Him, is a sweet and sacred thing. If even the most just must live in this fashion, how much more must I who am a poor sinner! Lord, I believe. I must trust Thee wholly. What else can I do? Trusting Thee is my life….


This Morning’s Meditation
April 20

That through death He might destroy him that had the power of death.”
—Hebrews 2:14.

O child of God, death hath lost its sting, because the devil’s power over it is destroyed. Then cease to fear dying. Ask grace from God the Holy Ghost, that by an intimate knowledge and a firm belief of thy Redeemer’s death, thou mayst be strengthened for that dread hour. Living near the cross of Calvary thou mayst think of death with pleasure, and welcome it when it comes with intense delight. It is sweet to die in the Lord: it is a covenant-blessing to sleep in Jesus. Death is no longer banishment, it is a return from exile, a going home to the many mansions where the loved ones already dwell. The distance between glorified spirits in heaven and militant saints on earth seems great; but it is not so. We are not far from home—a moment will bring us there. The sail is spread; the soul is launched upon the deep. How long will be its voyage? How many wearying winds must beat upon the sail ere it shall be reefed in the port of peace? How long shall that soul be tossed upon the waves before it comes to that sea which knows no storm? Listen to the answer, “Absent from the body, present with the Lord.” Yon ship has just departed, but it is already at its haven. It did but spread its sail and it was there. Like that ship of old, upon the Lake of Galilee, a storm had tossed it, but Jesus said, “Peace, be still,” and immediately it came to land. Think not that a long period intervenes between the instant of death and the eternity of glory. When the eyes close on earth they open in heaven. The horses of fire are not an instant on the road. Then, O child of God, what is there for thee to fear in death, seeing that through the death of thy Lord its curse and sting are destroyed? and now it is but a Jacob’s ladder whose foot is in the dark grave, but its top reaches to glory everlasting.

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